A walk down memory lane

I was driving around town the other day and passed an area on the West Side of Los Angeles which brought back some long forgotten memories. I was at a traffic stop on the corner of Doheny and Sunset; there was a bus-stand to my right. A man was standing by the bench...He was young and just stood there with arms crossed craning his neck to see if a bus was approaching....

I suddenly realized where I was. A flood of memories came rushing back. In a sense, it was on this street corner that my life in Los Angeles began so many years ago. The only store I recognized was a liquor store on the north side. No wonder it took me a while to realize where I was. The traffic light turned green and someone honked from behind. I pulled over, parked my car and decided to take a little stroll down memory lane.

As I walked the street, soaking up familiar scenes, I took another look at the bus stand. I remembered what it was like for me all those years ago. I arrived in LA from NYC in my early 20s with big dreams of making it in the entertainment industry. I secured an internship at a production company not far from the intersection of Sunset and Doheny. At that time, I didn't have any money and the internship was unpaid. A cousin of mine who lived in San Gabriel offered me a place to stay. It wasn't much of a place. Small and cramped but it was free and I wasn't complaining.

The daily journey to the West-Side was arduous.....LA is not known for it's excellent public transportation system and it was even worse back then. I had to take 2 buses and a subway to get to my destination and it took me about 3 hours one way.....I went from San Gabriel to downtown LA. Took the metro from downtown LA to Hollywood. From Hollywood, I took another bus all the way to Sunset and Doheny. I was usually the first employee to arrive at around 9am.

From the time I arrived in the morning, I made copies, ran errands, read scripts, wrote coverage, answered the phones, walked the bosses dogs. Every conceivable menial job you could imagine but they were great lessons and I learnt fortitude and patience. The folks I worked with were very nice but I wished they paid me even a couple of dollars a day. I wasn't looking for minimum wage, just a few bucks. But I didn't complain. Many of the interns I started with left quickly because they wouldn't stand working for nothing. It was tough. Often I only had enough money for bus fare so I lived on power bars for lunch and dinner, most of the week. To make matters worse, I nursed a right inguinal hernia which made it difficult to stand for long periods without it popping out but yet my work required that I stand on my feet all day long!

Once a week, on my journey home, I would treat myself to a simple dinner at a small Thai restaurant on Sunset and Vine. I had about 30 minutes between buses so I swung by the restaurant and wolfed down a vegetarian Thai fried rice with lots of carrots and broccoli.....and I always looked forward to my fortune cookie to see what it had in store for me. It was my crystal ball, bearer of news. Sounds silly looking back but as a struggling young man with multiple challenges and an uncertain future, the fortune cookie provided a tiny bit of comfort.

There was this one time I remember. It was pouring. Unusual for Southern CA. Must have been sometime in January. I finished work and was heading home when a storm broke out. Of course I didn't have an umbrella so I was forced to run out into the rain to catch my bus. Needless to say I was soaked to the bone. When I got to the bus stand, it was crowded full of people seeking shelter and the few buildings shelters nearby were also full of people. I couldn't risk walking into one of the stores because I could miss my bus...In the end, I simply gave up and sat on the sidewalk. Cold rain pouring down but I didn't care, I was just so tired. And then, this huge, stately Bentley Continental pulls up alongside me. The driver, obviously ignorant of my presence sitting below on the sidewalk was cosseted in the finest leather and advanced climate control system. Here I was, this street urchin compared to Mr Bentley, sitting on a sidewalk, rain drenched, and next to me this fabulously wealthy gentleman in a $300,000 automobile. The contrast couldn't have been be greater but then I realized for the first time in my life how completely free I was. I mean I had absolutely nothing to my name. No property, no car, no home, no family, nothing. I could simply get up, walk away or stay but I was not bound by anything or anyone. It was an incredible feeling which I've not been able to replicate since.

I got back to my car soon enough. Took another quick look at the street corner and drove off. I was glad I made the stop.....

The 3 Amigos

I’m convinced Mahmoud Ahmadinejad, president of Iran and Kim Jim Il, ruler of North Korea are in regular contact. Both nations never test fire nuclear missiles simultaneously. It’s either one or the other but never together. I think they alternate firing missiles to distract the world. For e.g when the EU and America hound Iran to accept inspectors to review their nuclear program, North Korea fires a few missiles into the Sea of Japan to distract the west away from Iran and ease the pressure. Iran returns the favor when the West begins hounding North Korea, by launching a couple of missiles. Coincidence or deliberate & calculated coordination? I don’t know but I find it interesting that both countries don’t ever fire their test missiles at the same time. I’m a bit of a conspiracy theorist so I tend to over-analyze when there is not much to analyze.

The circle is incomplete without Senor Hugo Chavez of Venezuela. He has many nicknames but one in particular is “La Cucaracha”. Not only is it the title of a popular drinking song, it is also the name of an exceptionally useless and annoying insect, the cockroach. This is a former paratrooper who has essentially taken over Venezuela and threatens to turn this once thriving, oil rich South American nation into another despot dominated country. If you recall, Chavez called then President Bush, El Diablo (the Devil) at a UN meeting a couple of years ago. His exact words were along the lines of “the devil was just here and I can still smell sulfur”. While Bush was certainly very unpopular and not well liked by many member nations, the utter lack of class displayed by Chavez who was supposed to be head of state representing his country at the UN, cost him a seat on the coveted security-council. A huge blow for a man who lobbied very hard to get it….Of course he blamed it on American meddling but many pro-Chavez nations voted against him; unusual, considering these voting countries had nothing to gain from opposing Chavez and in fact had poor relations with the US. One can only assume that many ambassadors were put off by the coarseness of his conduct. Had he put a lock on his lips and threw away the keys into one of his state owned oil-wells, he may well have succeeded in winning the prized seat……

The annual UN general assembly meeting is coming up next week. Leaders from all over the world descend on New York City ready to discuss problems of the world and offer up solutions and remedies. To me, it's like a giant photo opportunity and a chance for politicians to do what they do best; sit around tables and engage in endless dialogue…At the end of discussions, there is little consensus. Certainly not enough to craft real solutions to move the process forward but it happens every year. Big headlines, big promises, lots of hope but ultimately very little to show for by way of concrete, definable action. For all the fanfare, pomp and show, I always marvel at how much money politicians spend on private jets, fancy hotels, expensive meals and security detail just to attend events like these. All courtesy of tax dollars and if there is anything politicians enjoys more then staying in power forever, it’s spending tax dollars.…

German reliability

Today I had to take my car in unexpectedly to the service center so I spent a good chunk of the morning waiting for my car to get fixed.

I own an Audi. Always liked German cars but Audi's in particular for their understated elegance. Not near as flashy as the MBZ's or BMW's. Great cars to drive and solidly built. In fact, Audi build quality is legendary and considered the standard bearer of the automative industry. The Ingolstadt manufacturer's fit and finish are beyond reproach.

Years ago I started out Japanese. Japanese reliability was always drilled into my head by friends and family and so when I was ready to buy a car, I bought Japanese. A Nissan Maxima to be precise. It was good car and pretty reliable but it had no soul and the steering was utterly and completely lifeless. In short, no bloody fun to drive!

For some folks, a car is simply a means to an end. For me, it's the same but I strongly believe that you have to love what you drive. That love enhances the driving experience ten fold. Much like anything else in life. So I enjoy my Audi. I love driving it. I love the feel of a German car especially on the freeway. These cars were bred on the legendary autobahns. When it comes to high speed stability and road feel, German cars are still a cut above the rest. At least in my opinion.......

German cars however have one major drawback. Reliability. Now I never thought I would admit this but it's true. I've owned German cars for a few years now. Prior to this Audi, I owned a Volkswagen Passat. Although they are techonologically sophisticated and brimming with the latest gadgets, Deutschland simply doesn't understand the concept of reliability unlike our Japanese friends.

My Volkswagen Passat was a great car when it worked. But "when" it worked. The Volkswagen spent a lot of time in the shop. It's problems were mainly electrical. Like the digital compass going out, myriad sensor lights coming on, power window going kaput. All on a pretty new car with less then 10k miles. Once at about 8,000 miles, the ignition just died. I inserted my little key fob to start the engine and it simply wouldn't start up. Had to flat bed my baby all the way to the dealer who took a couple of days to fix her because parts weren't available.

My Audi's reliability has been markedly superior but I've still been plagued by a number of little issues. The first one and my car was hardly 3 month old then, was the oil warning light that kept coming on which warranted trips to the dealer. It turns out Audi's love OIL, and go through quarts of the black stuff very quickly. So the oil warning lights up every time levels dip below recommended levels. Not safe levels but recommended levels. Every couple of months I have to top off the oil which I've learnt to do by myself.

Today's trip to the dealer today happened because the engine alert warning light came on yesterday and the user manual recommended I take it in asap. Of course the dealer doesn't really care much about the fact that I need to take precious time out of my day to deal with the problem. Initially they asked me to drop my car off, get a rental at my own expense and come back when the car was ready. Absurd. I insisted on waiting and the service advisor was nice enough to make my car a priority. Apparently a coil for one of the cylinders expired and needed to be replaced. A $300 job had I been out of warranty.

High maintanence, yes, but the payoff is the opportunity to command a splendid machine.

Gamma Ray Burst (GRB)

Ever heard of a Gamma Ray Burst? Maybe something linked to the Incredible Hulk? Remember how Bruce Banner aka the Hulk was exposed to a massive dose of Gamma rays in a lab experiment gone wrong. It ultimately turned him into the raging Hulk. According to superhero lore, the Hulk is the most powerful of them all with near limitless muscle.

Unlike the Hulk though, a GRB is real. It's not science fiction or the stuff of imagination. It's a bona fide phenomenon. GRB's are some of the most powerful forces in the known universe. A single gamma ray burst energy output exceeds the total cumulative power of our sun over it's 10 billion year life cycle!

GRB's are usually created by exploding super stars. A super star can be 100 times larger then our own sun. These hulking masses burn bright, live fast and usually don't last very long. Our sun in comparison is not big enough to explode into a supernova but it's life span is much longer.

As the mega star begin it's death march and enters the final stages before ripping itself apart, it's rapidly rotating mass collapses to create a black hole. That ensuing collapse is referred to as a supernova. During that collapse, a GRB can occur. It usually only lasts a couple of seconds but the power generated during those few seconds is immeasurable.

So where are these GRB's? Any lurking in our corner of the universe? It's possible but they usually occur billions of light years away; in the far edges of the universe.

But I was watching a program on History Channel recently and a team of JPL scientist talked about a Wolf Rayet star (class of super stars usually about 20 times the mass of our sun) only about 8,000 light years away that appears highly unstable and poised to ignite. The explosion in itself poses no danger to our planet but it's axis is pointing directly towards Earth which means that we are staring down the barrel of a gun.

If the resulting supernova were to produce a GRB, Earth could be directly in the line of fire. A direct hit from a GRB even from 8,000 light years away, has the capacity to obliterate our atmosphere which will cause mass extinction. Imagine the earth without it's protective ozone. Solar winds from our sun will roast the blue planet alive.

Just around the corner

I recently found out that a friend was diagnosed with lung cancer. It was an aggressive form and had spread to her bones. The doctors considered it Stage 4 but the final verdict is still uncertain as modern medicine struggles to understand the exact scope and depth of the disease.

My friend called me and told me about the diagnosis a few weeks ago. She was obviously confused and frightened. They were more questions then answers. The only indication of the cancer was a persistent cough which she didn't think much off but decided to check it out. The first doctor brushed it aside but the 2^nd doctor ran a few scans which discovered the tumors…..

I often struggle with expressing emotion, a symptom of some repressed aspect of my childhood no doubt. As children, we were always taught that when dealing with difficult situations, real men held it in, kept their composure and left the wailing to the ladies…..

So when my friend called and broke the news, I didn't know how to respond. I was simply stunned. In fact, I wasn't even concentrating on all that she was saying. I was more concerned about formulating the right response and petrified about blurting out a generic, recycled response. I wanted to offer a meaningful, appropriate response that might offer this poor soul some little comfort. That was my overwhelming concern…..

This is really the first time I've had to deal with a situation like this. The first time someone I know quite well had been diagnosed with a serious, life threatening illness. And I simply could not imagine or even fathom the horror, the shock, the feeling of complete helplessness my friend was going through. Imagine being told you have stage 4 cancer and may only have a few months to live. How do you react? How do you process? What do you do?

I managed to muster all the sincerity I could find and said how very sorry I was and that I stood ready to help in any way possible. She was thankful. Conversation didn't last very long.

Life really is a fragile bubble. We go about it, convinced that nothing will happen but the world around us constantly reminds us that death is ever ready to pounce. Either we are oblivious or choose to be oblivious. Either way it doesn't matter because the reaper awaits, patiently. Ready to strike when our time is up. If we meditate on death for a moment, think about the inevitability of death, we realize how little time we really have and how much remains to be done.....

Back in the saddle

Ok it's been a couple of months since my last post. Writing disciplined, regular posts is not as easy as I imagined. Actually, I stopped posting because I simply didn't see the point to a blog. I was struggling to understand it's purpose. It seemed to me that a blog was simply meant to post self indulgent ramblings on a website for people to read. Plus no one ever reads this blog. I don't know how to advertise or get the word out. Or maybe a bunch of people have read the blog but found it dull and boring and just moved on.

In any case, I will start up again and see how it goes.................